Can you be a happy working mom?

Happy working mom

Bilna Sandeep

I am a Civil Engineer by profession who is also in love with putting my words together to help people I come across. After taking a career break and being a Stay At Home Mom for almost 2 years, I recently got back to work. I love to motivate and help boost up the confidence of other mothers in pursuing their passion be it in their Career or in starting their own Business.

Over the last two years, I have made quite a lot of new connections. Through my blog, through my LinkedIn, through many professional networking events. Each day I see my confidence grow. So are my ambitions. There are a few friends who have seen me from the beginning, who have seen me fall and get up. And there are the ones who have seen me only recently. Many of them see me as a strong woman. I have a lot of people look up to me. My family, my teammates and many more. It’s a great pleasure to see I have a positive role to play in their lives. And it is also a responsibility that I take.

 But, can you just be strong like that always? One of the most important aspects of my life is “being a mom”. And I know I am not the best at it. I am never perfect. I have my flaws and weaknesses. There are some days I find myself full of guilt, for not being able to spend so much of my time with my boy. I have a career that I do not want to compromise on, and a motherhood responsibility that I see as the highest priority of my existence. Then how do you find the right balance? 

I do this not by being strong, but by embracing my weaknesses. 

 My biggest weakness is my love for my family, and so is my strength. On some days I go to classes after work. This means I reach home late, almost in time for sleep. I have my motherhood responsibilities to take care of. I need to make sure my son gets the best of me. On the days I stayed home, there were days I found myself not being completely present. Though I used to get a lot of time to spend at home as a SAHM, I found myself spending more time online, or busy doing my chores. And I also had those pangs of depression hitting me on those days. At some point in time, I realised, to give the best of myself to my son, I had to embrace my passions. Which is the reason why I decided to get back to work and studies. But the motherhood guilt is a natural phenomenon. How do I conquer this now? I make sure I get enough quality time with my boy. I present a happier version of myself to him every day. And our bedtime is the best part of the day for me. I make sure to ask him about his day. I make sure he gets to communicate with me. It is just me and him for the last few moments of the day and I can see how it is helping to grow our bond.

I read about the nine minutes during the day that can make the greatest impact on your kids. 

  • first 3 minutes after they wake up
  • first 3 minutes after they return from school
  • last 3 minutes of the day before they go to sleep

I do not always get the first one. I rarely get the second one. But I make sure I am there for the last 3 minutes every day.

Have someone to hold your back

Well, finding the right hands to take care of your kids while you are away is one of the most important factors that keep you peaceful at work. I had my mom to support me all these while. But now its time for me to move on and I was lucky enough to find someone to manage my home as well as take care of my boy.

Lately, I got a Do-it-yourself home camera and installed at home. It’s one of the best choices I made because there was no installation required. All I had to do was download an app and connect to it. Now I get to see my son playing at home, while I am at work.

 Celebrate your little accomplishments and be grateful

If you get a chance to go out to the park with your little one on a working day, do it. And celebrate it. Because that is an accomplishment for us working moms. Not everyday are we able to do it. Not every other family is lucky enough to have those precious moments. Embrace every little moment you get to enjoy as a family. Be grateful for all the little accomplishments and happy moments in life.

Dump the negativity before you enter your “home”

Every day may be a struggle at work, battling the road traffic and many more. No matter what. Make sure you leave all that negativity outside before you enter your home. Make sure you are not on the phone while you get back from work. Look into the eyes of your kids and loved ones. Embrace them and let them know you are there for them.

Last and the most important – let your passion drive you

Money should not be the only reason that makes you come out of the four walls of your home. If you are spending time outside your home, make sure it is truly something that you are passionate about. Try to work in a sector that you enjoy. Love the work that you are doing and make sure it is worth every effort you are making. Well, I know it may not always be the case for all. But if you have a chance. Try to follow your passion and be in the kind of job that makes you feel worth it.

 So can you be a happy working mom?

Happiness is a choice that we make. Choose it and you will find it.

Happy working mom

Disclaimer: This article contains affiliate links. Which means I get a commission whenever you make a purchase using the link, at no additional expense to you.

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